Official Results 2007 Week #7

2007 Week #7

The Dugongs are serving their one-week suspension from the weekly summary this week.

FlyingElvis finished second for the third straight week and cut the BB lead in first place to 6 rank-points. FE accused the BBs of being a one-man team in 2006. Well, what goes around comes around. Which team can possibly be more one dimensional than FE? Brady scored a jaw-dropping 50.75 pts for FE. The Dolphins D was no match for Brady who played backyard football against the hopeless Fins by just putting the ball in the air and waiting for R Moss to catch it. If the game had been close, Brady could have easily thrown for 8 TDs. Osi Umenyiora also had a big day, getting most of his points on one play when he sacked the venerable Trent Dilfer (yes, he is still in the NFL), forced a fumble, picked it up himself and ran it in for 75 yards. The rest of FE’s lineup had a very average day, but it was a moot point. FE finished so far from first place (25.75 pts) and so far in front of Wax in third place (27.25 pts) that it did not matter for the standings.

WaxOnWaxOff returned in force after their blockbuster trade which landed them Ronnie Brown. Wax finished third, beating the BBs by a single point. However the mood very was down in Wax’s camp and there was no celebrating. This season has been crap all around for Wax and R Brown was not even able to play one full game for Wax before being lost for the season due to a torn ACL. Everything that Wax touches turns into doom. The third place helped Wax to move into 6^th place in the standings, but the loss of R Brown combined with the departure of Maroney and R Moss means that Wax has almost no hope for recovery until 2008. Oh and the other player involved in the trade was Brandon Marshall. Only a few days after being acquired by Wax, he drank his ass off and got arrested for DUI. Awesome. Things are well and good in Waxland! Wax was able to finish third this week thanks to Chad Pennington’s 28.5 pts. This was quite a change for Wax who normally gets horrible performances from the QB position. Pennington’s reign as a starter might be short-lived however, because he caused the Jets to lose another game by throwing an INT returned for a TD. How much longer will the Jets’, coach tolerate him?

The BeaudoinBrothers had a disappointing 4^th place finish. They only needed 2.25 pts from the Jaguars defense on MNF to beat Wax. The Colts’ powerful offense was in town so it was not easy, but 2.25 pts is not that hard to get. They failed to the task, only getting a single point. Romo had his first game for the BBs since the trade and had a sub-par game with 11.25 pts while Roethlisberger scored 25 pts on the bench. The BBs were hurting a bit with LT and Gates on bye, but replacements K Jones and Witten had good days with 14 and 14.25 pts respectively. College player Graham Harrell had his worst outing of the season by far, only scoring 0.75 pt. His previous low was 9 pts. D Ryans prevented the BBs from falling further this week thanks to a 27-pt performance that included a TD on a fumble recovery.

OldNo7 had another average week with a 5^th place. R Wayne and Vinatieri had a chance on MNF to bring Old to third place but could not get it done, losing to the BBs and Wax by less than 4 and 5 pts. C Palmer was expected to have a huge day against the Jets but could only come up with 9.5 pts. Old got decent production from the core players (RBs and WRs) with all four starters scoring between 12.5 and 15.5 pts. Even Shockey had a decent day with a season-high 11.75 pts. The problem was defense however, which is supposed to be a strength for Old, but not this week. The Bears, W Smith, Briggs, D Johnson, and D Robinson combined for only 34 pts. London Fletcher alone scored 26.5 pts on the bench. Fletcher is currently the league’s second best LB but he has only started once for Old this year! He must have pissed in the coach’s Cheerios or something.

UncleJack finished in the bottom three for the third straight week. Franchise player P Manning led the team with 16.5 pts on the road against the Jaguars which was an adequate performance. C Portis had a good first game in the UJ uniform with 15.75 pts. However the other UJ acquisition Jacoby Jones lost a fumble, leading to a score of only 0.5 pt. UJ’s LBs were very bad this week, registering only 9.5 pts combined for Tatupu and Farrior. Even benched LBs did not do much with 7 and 6.5 pts for Ad Thomas and D Ware. The Steelers defense was also surprisingly bad against the Broncos with only 5 pts. The Broncos were only 2 last-minute FGs away from being an 0-5 team, but the Steelers could not hold them in check. Note the continued decline of Chad Johnson. CJ started strong by averaging 22.3 pts per week in the first three weeks, but his average since then is only 8.8 pts per game. He is an important reason for UJ’s recent struggles.

The Decepticons’ yo-yo continued this week. Each odd week has been a bottom three finish and each even week has been a top three finish. Week #7 being an odd week, the Cons struggled by only scoring 106 pts. The coach started the wrong QB by using J Campbell (0.5 pts) instead of Cutler (20.5 pts) or Brees (16.75 pts). T Henry has not been suspended for his drug addiction yet, but he might as well be. He only scored 3.25 pts this week while backups B Jacobs and L White both scored over 15 pts. WR Roy Williams had his third bad game in a row by scoring a season-low 4 pts this week. He scored 53 pts in his first three games but only 16.25 pts in his last three. Cooley followed up his big week #6 (20.25 pts) with only 1 pt this week. His lead over his nemesis Shockey shrank to only one point per game on average. Note that rookie P Willis continues to pile up the points in the shadow of Adrian Peterson. Willis ranks second with 11.8 pts per week on average. Dec cannot wait for the college football season to be over. M Hart and Ian Johnson were both out to injury this week.

The Spitoons finished last this week for already the third time this year and dropped to last in the standings as well. Jason Taylor was the only player on the team to do anything this week, returning an INT for a 36-yd TD. However it was the only play that he made all game long because he had no tackle, no assist, and no sack. And his INT came against the backup QB of the Patriots. Way to go. After Taylor, there was crap all over the Spitoons lineup this week: starters, bench, coaching, even the Spitoons’ cheerleaders were fat and butt-ugly this week. No Spi starter managed to score above 10 pts other than Taylor and L Fitz (10.75 pts), no benched player scored more than 11.75 pts (E Manning), and the Spitoons coaching efficiency was 7^th of 8 this week. Even if the Spitoons had gotten a 100% coaching efficiency, they would have not reached 110 pts. Note the remarkable suckness level of franchise player Shaun Alexander. Alexander had 19 carries for 47 yards for an average of 2.5 yards per carry, a reception of 18 yards, and no TD in a 33-6 home win against the Rams. How much worse can it get? Alexander fills up his franchise player role to perfection, giving the example to the rest of his team. The Spitoons will probably compete with Wax for last place in the standings this year.

Note: sometimes the NFL announces stats changes and according to PQBFL rules, the results are not totally official until Sunday 1pm Eastern.

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