Official Results 2006 Week #8

2006 Week #8

The BeaudoinBrothers got their second win in three weeks with 174.5 pts . Franchise player LT carried the team with 39 pts. This was LT's best game since he is wearing the BB uniform (2004). M Vick is starting to look like the promising QB that he was drafted for. If he can start passing well in addition to running well, he will be a monster. Vick had his second straight great week with 32 pts. He is now the 3rd best QB in the PQBFL, only trailing behind studs P Manning (UJ) and D McNabb (Dec). CJ talked trash before this week's game and it finally paid off. He scored only his 2nd TD of the year and got 15.5 pts. It was about time for him to get out of his slump. For the first time in a while, he did better than jack-ass TJ Housh (FE) and it was the difference between the BBs and FE this week. The BBs seem to have put their early-season problems behind and have been the best team since week #6. They have distanced Wax and Old in the standings and are now tied with the Spitoons in 2nd place. Note that the BBs have not been in the red (bottom 2) for 27 straight weeks. This crushes the 2nd longest streak in the history of the league (17 straight weeks, Beaud 1999 week #4 to 2000 week #3).

FlyingElvis continues to have one of the most, if not the most dangerous team in the PQBFL, but this week the coach fucked up real bad. He initially picked Ed Reed to start at DB. But on Sunday morning, the coach changed his mind and decided to start Sean Taylor. Because S Taylor was on a bye week, it looks like the coach was afraid Reed would score negative points? This turned out to be a huge mistake because E Reed scored 5 pts and FE lost by 3. Instead of leading the BBs in the standings by 4.5 rank-points, FE's lead is only 2.5 rank-points. Some teams have started players on bye in the past. But nobody ever changed their lineup on Sunday to start a player on bye! BONE-HEAD MOVE OF THE YEAR! Not to mention FE started newly acquired P Rivers for a third straight week. It was one too many. Rivers did not have a bad game (13.5 pts) but Brady scored 30 pts so it could have been an easy win for FE this week. LJ was the top scorer for FE this week with 35 pts. He is now the league's 2nd best RB. TE Watson had his first good game of the year with 17.5 pts on MNF. He came very close to rallying FE to a comeback win but he fell just short.

Since the Decepticons traded Tiki Barber, they have finished 2nd and 3rd for a 2-week total of 13 rank-points, the best 2-week stretch for Dec this season. Maybe Tiki was a bad apple? Or maybe the Decepticons' management now regrets throwing the towel too early? The Cons are now only 3 rank-points behind Wax who is in 4th place. For the first time of the year, the Decepticons were able to have a good week without McNabb who disappointed with only 8 pts. Reggie Wayne exploded for 35.5 pts this week against the Broncos. Rookie V Young was also a big factor with 20 pts. It was his best game of the year by far and he moved up to 7th best rookie in the league. This week, T Jones outscored Tiki 16 to 7 so at least in the short term, the Tiki trade has been paying off, especially if Tiki already has his head into retirement planning. On defense, week #8 was pretty low scoring. The Decepticons got the 2nd best performance this week by their 4 defensive starters with 35 pts. DL Burgess dominated the Steelers o-line with 2.5 sacks and R Barber scored double-digits once again and he continues to lead all defensive players in the league.

The Spitoons had a slowdown in production for the second time this year after a win. This week was not as bad however with a 4th place. The Spitoons are still impatiently waiting for the return of S Alex and are still doing a decent job of staying towards the top of the standings. Backup RB C Dillon was shitty this time however with only 2.5 pts. The other RB Westbrook was held to only 8 pts. He has slowed down recently because this was his 3rd game below 10 in the last four weeks. WR Harrison also had an off week as P Manning focused on R Wayne. Harrison scored 6.5 pts which was his first single-digit score of the year. The Ravens D continued to do well with 2 more TDs this week. TE Winslow has also been a surprising star for the Spitoons this year. He scored 17.5 pts and took back the TE1 spot in the league in front of A Gates (Beaud) . Who would have thought!

UncleJack had another average week with a 5th place, but he continues to scrape valuable rank-points away from the Dugongs. UJ now has a comfortable 7 rank-point lead on Dug. Unfortunately, the recent success of Dec means UJ is also getting away from 6th place. This week, P Manning almost did it all himself with 30.5 pts against the Broncos. The Broncos D had allowed only 2 passing TDs all year and Manning threw for three by himself. W Parker also had a good game with 16 pts and moved up in the top 10 RB in the league. L Jordan's injury adds to UJ's problem at the RB position. Jordan was benched due to a bad back, and starter M Anderson did not even get a carry in the game. At WR, Boldin was a little banged up as well so the coach decided to bench him too. Rod Smith replaced him and he was dreadful with only 2 pts. UJ needs L Jordan and Boldin to be healthy to stand a chance for a top 3 finish this year. Every team in the PQBFL has at least one top 2 finishes so far this year except for UJ who has not done better than 4th place all year. UJ has not been in the top 3 for eleven straight weeks (last time was week #14 in 2005). But here is worse: UJ has not won a week for 34 straight weeks!!! (last time was week #8 in 2004) . This is a full two seasons without being on top. This is obviously crushing the PQBFL record for the number of winless weeks. The second worst team was OldNo7 who waited 28 weeks to win after joining the league as an expansion team. The third worst streak was the Spitoons (19 weeks), also after joining the league as an expansion team.

OldNo7 got their players back from bye week, but they looked rusty. Old could not do better than 6th place. Ju Peppers only had to score 6 pts on SNF to beat UJ but he got his worst game of the year for the second straight week with only 2 pts. The coach can also be blamed for benching J Witten (15 pts) and starting Bubba Franks (0 pt) instead . Star WR T Holt had a rare off-week with only 7 pts against the tough Chargers defense on the road. Holt did not get so few points all of last year except in week #17. Rookie R Bush continues to disappoint, and now he is injured. Bush only had 21 total yards and even threw an INT before leaving the game with an ankle injury. Chances are now pretty remote that Old will give him the franchise player tag. WR Andre Johnson had another good week with 20.5 pts. This was the third time in his last four games that A Johnson scored 20 pts or more. His worst two weeks of the season were weeks #1 and #2 with 11 pts and 12.5 pts. It is a big surprise to see him at the WR1 spot in the PQBFL in front of big names like S Smith, Holt, R Wayne, and T Owens. And nobody even talks about the guy!

WaxOnWaxOff got a 2nd horrible week in a row since acquiring Tiki - the opposite as for the Decepticons. Wax scored a season-low 89 pts and was lucky to beat the lowly Dugongs by half a point on MNF. Wax had three players on MNF: Maroney, Wiggings, and A Winfield. They combined to 13.5 pts. The Dugongs only had one player left: Vrabel. He also scored 13.5 pts. Wax came close to the shame of losing to the worst team in the league despite having three players going against a linebacker! For a team with PQBFL championship aspirations, this is an embarrassment . Other than P Burress and R Lewis who scored 16 and 15 pts, the rest of Wax's team was awful despite a quick start on Sunday (E Manning threw a TD pass to P Burress and Rudi scored early). Wax got shut out for the rest of the day. R Moss is a very frustrating WR to have. He can have a good game on the bench, but Wax gave him a rare start and he bombed out with only 3 pts. The Falcons D were lit up by the Bengals and only scored 2 pts. Polamalu had a below-average game with only 5 pts. Finally, rookie Maroney continues to struggle with only 5.5 pts this week. After a promising start, he has fallen to 5th best rookie and it's only a matter of time until J Addai (Old) passes him in 5th place.

The league doormats the Dugongs finished last for the third time in five weeks. They even had a retroactive stat change affect them last week which allowed their rivals UJ to beat them. This prompted the Dugongs team management to accuse the PQBFL commissioners to plan a conspiracy to beat up the Dugongs to death even though they are already down . One has to admit that it was pretty funny that a stat change had to impact the Dugongs in the exact week where they were able to knock off their most important opponent in a close week . But the Dugongs should instead focus on what's happening on the field. The Dugongs seem to be getting worse every week. They have only scored over 120 pts twice this season. Once again, the QB position is killing the Dugongs. While other teams start P Manning, D McNabb, M Vick, E Manning, and C Palmer, the Dugongs are going to the war with David Carr? Carr had a few good games early on but it was all in garbage time. Carr scored MINUS 5 pts this week as he turned the ball over three times. Carr is probably still overrated as the 15th best QB in the league. Who would have thought that the Dugongs would start Keyshawn Johnson this year. That's right, Keyshawn Johnson! Well the dude answered with 1.5 pt while Kennison / Horn (two more old fuck WR ) on the bench had 12.5 pts and 18 pts. The future of the Dugongs is bright, maybe one of these 50-year old WRs will break out next year when they are on the Dugongs' saved team. The Dugongs are the laughing stock of the PQBFL right now and are absolutely clueless on the field. However, all those shit performances hid the fact that the Dugongs LBs performed very well this week with 13.5 pts from Vrabel and 17.5 pts from Brackett. Rookie Mike Bell was benched because he was not getting many carries anymore, but that may have changed starting this week. M Bell scored 21.5 pts this week and he could be critical in helping the Dugongs get some respect. This is sorely needed because the Dugongs have finished in the bottom three for seven straight weeks now. As much as FE sucked last year, their winning percentage was .275 (28 wins 74 losses). This year, the Dugongs are even worse with a winning percentage of .241 (13.5 wins 42.5 losses). Here is a picture of the Dugongs' fans as seen in Dugongs stadium with a paper bag on their head:

The Dugongs can rest in peace however, because the all-time shittiest season established by OldNo7 in 2000 (winning percentage .132 with 9 wins 59 losses) is a record that will ***never*** be beat unless a retard joins the PQBFL. Remember that this was OldNo7's expansion season and the GM was drunk during the draft because everybody waited for two hours for the Dugongs to submit their 2nd round pick. Old was tired of waiting and started to drink . What a memorable season that was. For a trip down memory lane, OldNo7 had the worst players at almost every position that year. Oh yeah, and their highest ranking player was a freakin' kicker with Longwell as #2 in the league. Longwell's average (9.2 pts per game) was twice as much as Old's 2nd best RB (Alstott 4.6 pts per game) . Old had the worst three RBs in the league with Alstott, Kimble Anders, and Curtis Enis. This trio of RBs scored zero or negative points 24 times during that season (8 times each on average so 50% of the time) as they rotated all year long to start at RB for Old. Unbelievable.

Note: sometimes the NFL announces stats changes and according to PQBFL rules, the results are not totally official until Sunday 1pm Eastern.

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